Certain Searches for Certain Subjects

Last week I got a call from Pat Cunningham. Those of you who only know me from the internet will not know that I have spent many work hours listening to him talk politics on my local AM station. He writes for the local paper now and he wanted to talk to me about blogging. I agreed to do an interview and have my photo taken and then immediately had to review every embarrassing thing I’ve ever posted here and oh yeah, there’s a lot of ‘em and no I won't point them out, you'll have to find them on your own. Yes, I realize I was the one who chose to publish it out here for all the world and God herself to see so I’ll move on.

Pat called me for the interview and I’m pretty sure I just babbled endlessly on the phone. You see, the best part about writing is the reviewing process (and thesaurus) but when you have to actually speak, well any ol’ thing can just pop out of your mouth and then if you’re nervous you may not quite remember how ludicrous you sounded until you read it in the Sunday paper. I actually said to him "...If people in government do searches for certain subjects on the Internet, like subjects I’ve been blogging on, then I’m one more voice." I must've said it because there it is on page 2D. I swear, I smart too!

What I meant was - If politicians want a good measure of what people actually think for starters they can find today’s hot links. In a world were polls are pushed and pulled in any direction you like and one can find statistics to support any asinine thing, an actual real life opinion is invaluable… to some.

Get this - Winnebago County Board Member and Republican Majority Leader, Tim Simms said "he's seen no influence from local blogs and doesn't expect any: 'What you get from blogs is worth exactly what you pay for it - nothing.'" This is the same yahoo who voted last week to give himself a 50% pay hike on the backs of the tax payers. I was going to try and post his e-mail so you could all let him know exactly what you think but alas this representative of the people doesn't have e-mail.

Back to me. The photographer came on the day I woke up to the Mount Rushmore of zits between my eyes. I named the zit Herman and promptly troweled some makeup on him while I frantically cleaned up my desk and surrounding area. They wanted a picture of me blogging and would you believe, he took photos from every angle except the one that included the part of my house that I cleaned. I believe I may have had a load of laundry I was trying to fold somewhere in one of the photos. I asked him if I could see the photo and he mumbled something about against policy or national security but I think he just didn't want to deal with a raving housewife claiming she can smile better if he would just take one more. I didn’t tackle him down on the way to his car and steal his film– so my half folded laundry and my zit and my heap of toys and my closed eyes and half open mouth because I’m babbling again photo sits right there on 2D.

and I’m now going to go buy copies for my Grandmas.

PS I think my cover is blown, my semi anonymous blogging career is over and a new era will begin. So let me now give you this disclaimer:

Upon reading this blog, if you think I’m talking about you and it’s bad – I’m not, it’s someone who may be just like you but I assure you it’s not. If it’s good, then yeah it’s totally you. Also, if you are appalled by my behavior and or writing and you are my Grandma, Aunt, Uncle, previous teacher or anyone who has thought nice things about me in the past please just tell yourself that I am probably exaggerating for the sake of the story. That is all.