Ella is into rhyming things and she often walks around singing nonsensical words to herself and when I say singing, I mean yelling them in different random notes as loud as she can. It’s often pretty cute to see her run through the kitchen wailing
“Mamma! Bamma, comma, mom, som, wom, wommy, mommy, blommy, pommy, mommmmmmeeeee!”
Last Tuesday Dan and Ella and I went to see a concert in the park in the city and decided to stop at the local upscale grocery store and get dinner on the way. When I say upscale, I mean they often have wine tasting in isle seven and in the winter the ladies who shop there wear furs through the frozen organic veggies isle. We normally wouldn’t shop there because we don’t like spending seven dollars on butter and the valet gives me a cough of disapproval when he has to get into my Cheeto crumb filled Dodge and park it in between the Lexus’s.
We went in trying to locate $50.00 deli ham sandwiches and of course Ella took off running through the isles and giggling. Dan shot me a look that said ‘it’s your turn to chase her’. I was ready to show off my superior parenting skills by putting into action 'Operation Abandoned Child' in which Ella runs away with glee and I pretend I don’t even see her running and she gets to the end of the isle, gets scared and consequently runs back to my side wailing and begging to hang on to my hand the remainder of the trip. This time Ella had a different plan in mind, I was still getting the look from Dan when Ella started to run faster singing her rhyming game and this time she had taken the word “quit” and morphed it into a lovely little song that went
“Quit, quit, shit! Shit shit SHIT! Shitty shit oh shitty shitty shit!”
Dan looked at me and proclaimed loud enough for the patrons to hear “It’s your kid!” There was no mistaking what she was singing, little old ladies dressed in pink Polo’s and Khakis quietly pondering NY Strips or lamb chops whirled around to see my bright young toddler singing obscenities past the butcher counter. Dan and I were now walking at a pretty brisk pace trying to nab our daughter by the back of the dress when the worst happened, I got the giggles. Upon hearing my laugh Ella was totally encouraged and ran faster and sang louder, soon the whole store was hearing her croon
“Shhhhhit! Shitty shitty shitty shit shit shiiiiiiiiiiiiiitah!”
And I seriously couldn’t stop laughing. I doubled over with great big snorky guffaws and couldn’t give a proper chase. Dan finally caught up with her in the cheese isle and hoisted her up onto his shoulders. When I found my composure and caught up to them I said “Aren’t you glad we aren’t at our neighborhood grocery?” and Dan smiled big and nodded like crazy.