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ESPN The Magazine Ignores Roller Derby Community by F'n EXpat - 42

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Edit: The original artical posted was the following
ESPN Snubs Roller Derby In Spite Of Overwhelming Fan Vote

Change made after 1st comment below.

Snapped

I was at derby practice last Wednesday and got my skates knocked out from underneath me.  I felt my leg snap on the way down.  I laid on the floor for a second and then got all my gear off before refusing to let the coach call an ambulance and opting for my teammate to drive my car a mile to the packed ER.  I sat in the wheelchair in the hallway behind the magical doors that separate the milling around texting/Angry Birds playing world from the I'm seriously dying part, for about fifteen minutes.  I was moaning,  shaking and trying not to throw up just like having a baby, but they had no beds available. And I couldn't wait in the hall moaning like that, as I was freaking the hurt patients out. "Ma'am if you can't stop that, we'll have to ask you to leave" to which I replied "I really can't heeooooOOOOooooooowlp it!"  She shook her head and wheeled me back into the waiting room to next to toothache guy, sore throat kid and ugly pajamas lady.  She put a slip of paper with the number 5400 in the barf bucket I was holding in my lap and made sure to face me into the corner so nobody could knock into my leg on the way to get a bag of Fritos.  My teammate Mellon Collie ran interference when cops came in and brought a very pissed off and bloody handcuffed lady past.  Mel was ready to hip check anyone that got near my wheelchair. Our trusty track-man, Scott,  held vigil over my leg keeping it steady with his bare hands because the emergency personnel didn't have a board.  We waited while they called out the numbers leading up to 5400, bitterly triaging every person that went in front of me with a quick scan of how they were walking.  Two hours and six x-rays later they put a splint on the back of my leg, wrapped it with an ace bandage and sent me home with instructions to call a doctor.  

The next morning I called the number they referred, before I even got out of bed.  They said they'd call me back and let me know when I could come in.  Hours went by.  I called back in and they said "Ma'am, it takes 24 to 48 hours for the doctor to review your records and then we will call you to let you know what we have available." I had just gotten the 'don't call us, we'll call you' from someone who wouldn't even use my name.  I thought about the wait the night before.  Then I refused.  I looked up orthos in my city and called the next doctor, who's secretary Pam, said she would talk to the doc and get my x-rays sent over and call me back.  Five minutes later Pam was on the phone again telling me I should come in to see Dr. McCarty right now. I did.  But first I took a little joy in calling the first ortho back to tell them I'd gotten in somewhere else immediately.  They apologized.  They explained their triage department usually gets back to people sooner. They said if it was a break, they didn't know what could be taking so long.  They said they'd make a note about it in the file.  I cringe to think what the note says about me.  Dr. McCarty put an air cast on my leg.  It gets big and small to allow for swelling and looks like a big piece of machinery.  It has plastic armour on the outside and holes for pumping it up and velcro to hold it on and since it's not the signing type of cast, I'd like to get some stickers for decorating it.

Stopped On Wheels

She's skating straight at me and at the very last moment before she hammers full force into my sternum she turns her hips and her wheels make a great breaking screech and she's standing there blinking smiling like she's waiting for a bus.  This is the hockey-stop I've been working on for two years.  It's taking so long because I had excuses.  My excuses were; I had an ACL surgery, a divorce, a move three states away, and a new derby league.  Now I am out of excuse.  I do them at the end of practice and when we're doing foot worky things but it's slow going.  I hesitate. I question.  I over-analize.  I forget to work on them.  I feel like I kinda have it, sometimes I make that great scritching noise with my wheels but I don't yet have the nerve to try it going full blast with someone standing in the way yet.  I will though.  Then I will hockey stop all over town, screeching up and sliding in sideways like the Dukes of Hazard announcing "I could have plowed into you with everything I have, but choose not to."

 

Uniform

Once you fall in love with roller derby it's hard to not want to put the uniform on every day.  Most skatey ladies I know would if they had the time.  I've been skating now for seven years and every where I've visited we all wear the same thing; skates, elbow pads, knee pads, wrist guards, mouth guard, helmet, the need for speed and the indelible habit of getting back up when knocked down.  That last part of the uniform most of us wear for the rest of our lives, right along with whatever ink we had poked into our skin and scars we earned from getting broken and the friendships we forged from the shared frustrations of it all.

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Roller Girl 

You're all elbow 
 And hip 
 And heart 

 A blur and a 
 Bruise 
 And a booty 
 Block into 
 Love's suicide 
 Seats. 

 By - T.L. Vaultonburg

Feminist Walking

                   www.guerrillagirls.com

Have you ever been walking in a crowd and been faced with a daring game of pedestrian chicken; both people walking straight at each other?  In high school it was the stuff of teenage boy fights.  Two boys would shoulder check each other and then one would yell, "bring it!" and they'd be off and rolling around on the hallway floor while people formed a circle and chanted "FIGHT!"

In adult life, polite society, and even not so polite society, this crazy game of pedestrian chicken happens all the time.  Think about being in the grocery and people with their carts.  Think about a festival you may have been to and what it was like to walk through a crowd.

At some point in the last few years I stopped moving out of the way.  I think it was around the time I had Ella.  The fact was; I was exhausted most of the time and carrying baby on one hip and a diaper bag and purse on the other side.  Making those extra three steps to move for a grown-ass-man, in a crowd, was a concession I just didn't have the energy to make.  You would be surprised how many times I've been shoulder checked with a baby in my arms.  Because  not only do I not move, but I refuse to be the one to shrink out of the way, to contort my whole being around someone not carrying another human in their arms.

When my extra human was big enough to walk, we'd hold hands through a crowd and people would automatically make way for us. You see there is a hierarchy.  People get out of the way for little kids, bleeding people, old people, someone who looks like they're about to barf and people with guns.  Otherwise you're on your own and in my experience it's often the women who are shrinking out of the way or expected to move.  In fact once I started paying attention I realized how often women apologize for what seems like just taking up space on the planet.  This is about the time I joined roller derby and was learning how to purposefully take up space on the track.  I was learning how to be wide and plant my feet, how to have a presence and not only claim my spot, but defend it.

I learned from roller derby and catching beads at many a Mardi Gras parade, if you shrink and don't own your space, people will muscle in and take it from you, get past you on the track, or catch those beads right in front of your face.  You have to stand wide and think large.  You have to be ready to not shrink back when people bump into you.  You have to hold your head high, look people in the eye, be present and say "Excuse me" when you want people to move out of your way.

Since this new attitude, I have been in more than one argument with the man I was walking with, about my refusal to yield.  My stance is, given all things equal, why should it be my responsibility to move.  Especially now that I am again carrying a small human on my hip and sometime limping (when it gets cold my knee gets creaky.)  It's a hard thing to explain to someone.  I've been called aggressive, rude and selfish.  While I understand if you're seeing this crazy dance for the first time; the one where I walk with purpose and a teenage boy or grown man is caught off guard by me not getting out of his way, and then suddenly he's doing an awkward dance to get around me.  It seems harsh and startling, and you might turn and ask me  "Why didn't you just move?!" And if it were only on occasion this happened, I probably would have, but you have to understand, it's often.  So often I'm tired of it.  So no, I won't move nor will I feel bad about it.

It's not like I'm trampling people trying to get through the doors to Walmart on Black Friday, or hip checking people in walkers to get through a door first, I still have manners.  I'm just un-apologetically existing in my own personal space and refusing to yield just because someone else is oblivious.  When you lean into my space on a train or while standing in line, I will widen my stance in an effort to tell you to back off.  And should you decide to play pedestrian chicken with me, you should know I spend several hours a week seriously training for a shoulder or hip check...  and I'm even talented enough to do it on wheels.

Also know that if it's just me walking and I'm approaching a man carrying a kid and a diaper bag etc, I step out of the way.  And recently, I know a guy who was rammed in the back of the legs with a shopping cart because he was walking slow.  So I know it's not just women this happens to, but I think a most of the time it is gender specific.  In fact, I read another blog about this same subject a few months ago and I wish I could find it again, I'd link (I'll keep looking.) Do you have a story? Do you find yourself moving? Apologizing often for being in the way? Or perhaps you are a ground stander? Have read this same topic somewhere? I'd like to hear about it.

I Jammed

Whole 09.15.12 Flickr set HERE  

This was my first game with the Rockford Rage.  It was the Ragdolls vs IL Valley Vixens, a non-sanctioned WFTDA bout.  We lost by two points in the last three jams 116-114.  Not bad for our first time all playing together.  We have a bunch of new skaters from other leagues this season, so it's been super fun making all new pals. This was also my first game back since my knee surgery.  I wore the DonJoy knee brace and it worked pretty well.  I think I did all right.  I remember getting lead a few times and I remember knocking the other jammer down, but I also remember getting stuck behind blocker number 5 and her cohort for most of a jam and getting a major for cutting.  So, this season I will concentrate on jamming and all the many things that requires.

Photos by KORfan

I've been having dreams that I am getting ready to play, but I don't have all my pads, or I lost my favorite socks and I'm not ready.  I think it's the same dream as when you find yourself at work or school without pants, but in derby if you find yourself without pants chances are that's on purpose.  Next month's bout is October 13th.  It's a mixer, meaning teams from everywhere are invited and all scrambled up and split down the middle.  Mixers are pretty fun, you get to play next to people you normally don't and soak up new plays and knowledge as well as just have a fun time.  Usually there is a theme and some crazy outfits... yes even more crazy than no-pants.  You should come and watch.  You should also cheer for the team I am on.

Saturday Roller Derby Recap

Via Kiki @ I Still Hate Pickles.  I'm in there!

Grateful Heart

The Houston Roller Derby Awards Ceremony was Saturday night.  It was a formal, at the very elegant Nouveau Antique Art Bar and everyone looked stunning.  When you are used to seeing people all sweaty and with helmet hair it's amazing to suddenly see them looking like Ginger on Gilligan's Island. I wish I'd taken more photos.  Even the referees wore tuxedos.  I was excited to hear the awards, as people I voted for won things.  Notably my team mate and pal, Shocker Zulu won most improved.  She's gone from not being able to do a cross-over to pure blocking menace.  I love watching her play.  Shank, also my team mate and friend, took MVP because she is an amazing unexhaustable triple threat.  The award was accepted on her behalf as she was home getting ready for a marathon on Sunday morning - yeah, she's awesome like that.   Yours truly won the Purple Heart award for getting hurt this season and though it's the part of the ceremony where we give out the not so serous awards for things like Best Rack and Miss Congeniality, it meant a lot to me to know that people missed me and recognized such a tough event in my life.

Changes

Blowing my ACL and giving up skating was a shock to the psyche. Unlike when I was just pregnant, I needed to be cautious with my leg and let it heal, I had to relearn how to walk up and down steps and make it to physical therapy three times a week.  It takes up all of my energy chasing a fraggle haired, little danger man around the house while also being mindful of the gentle feelings of a drama loving seven year old.  Hiring a sitter and going to derby practice once a week over November and December to stand in the middle of the track I so desperately wanted to be on, seemed like it would be torturous, both physically and mentally even though I missed it so much.

In January I hope to be cleared for endurance skating and would like to start attending Houston Roller Derby's Recreational League on Tuesday nights. I want to have a little of it back, with less of a commitment, at least until I'm done healing.  Then I'll reassess my situation and think about what is next.  I'd like time to plan and dream and anticipate what's next.  I'd like to be able to have a little control back even though I don't know what will come of it.  I just want it to be on my terms.

I miss skating until my legs are numb, my lungs burning with lactic acid and ego. I miss celebrating and being proud about the little accomplishments, both my team mates and mine.  I miss being soaking wet with sweat and delirious with happy.  I miss having all sorts of interesting people in my life every week and knowing who is ill, in love, has a blister and what people are seeing, eating, reading and listening to, what their goals are. I wasn't ready to give it up so abruptly.

I am used to living along side an army of diverse, tough women. It's hard when life changes without permission. Sometimes it takes a long time to adjust. I'm just now feeling like I live in Texas, despite my third Christmas in the Bayou.  I still feel like I can't buy expensive jeans because I just had a baby, though Jack is looking towards age two and riding a trike. Though I don't see my skatey-mates enough to tell you what color their hair is any more, letting go of these women and the derby community may take a lifetime.

Frankenee

In which I talk about my surgery (not very exciting unless you've googled ACL injury/are about to have the same proceedure.)

The bone patellar bone ACL reconstruction surgery I had after the complete tear in ACL from playing roller derby, performed by Dr. Walter Lowe in Houston, TX, went very well.  I've relied on wonderful friends and neighbors to get through the first week despite my desire to do everything on my own.  So, if you're at this blog post for insight before you have it done,  please get someone to help you for the first week, you will need it.  I had the proceedure on Thursday I went back to the doc today and they gave me a 60° bend in my brace and unwrapped the gauze.  It feels wonderful to be able to bend it some and even better to have all the wrapping off.  It wasn't as scrambled as I expected it to look under there and I'm a week away from getting the stitches out and being able to have a good soak in the tub.  Here's what it looks like 5 days after surgery (today) while the brace is off.  You can click to embiggen.

Thank you Kiki, for going with
 and taking the gross photo.

The pain of the first two days after surgery are something to sleep through.  The physical therapy regime is full and difficult but will get me back up and going fast so I'm eager.  In an earlier post, I misspoke, I do have two screws in there, one will turn into bone eventually and the other is titanium and MRI/metal detector safe.  I'll keep posting the progress and the evolution of the scar that I don't think I'll mind.  I'm viewing it as one would view a tattoo, it's a permanent reminder of a time in my life that I loved (more on that later when I can wrap my head around my gratitude.)

Gateway Breakfast Food

My friend Derek was at the after party last night with a baggie of candied bacon in his pocket.  He'd pull it out and open the bag wafting bacon smell out into your face before the offer "Candied bacon?"  The first one is free kid. Little did I know that one bite of it would lead me out to the food truck outside where they were selling chocolate covered bacon which I loved soo much that later when our coach pulled out a bacon chocolate bar and offer everyone in the room a square, I would put both hands up and yell  "Me! Me! Oooh, me me  me! Pick me!" while hip checking every one in the way, between me and that little square of artery hardening goodness.  I hope last night's binge doesn't lead to a hardcore deep fried butter habit.

***

Dear Greenpeace, sending me an e-mail with the subject line "A Horrible Way to Die" does not entice me to open your e-mail.  Put some candied bacon in your pocket.

New Knee News

In three weeks the swelling should be gone and my range of motion back and I go back for a recheck with the surgeon and to schedule an ACL recosntruction. They do it out-patient and depending on which procedure I get done I could be back in good form before 2012. Now I just need to read everything I can about the difference between a hamstring autograft and a bone patellar bone autograft. Anyone had either?

The Seventeenth Floor

I went to physical therapy yesterday and it was glorious. I hadn't straightened my knee out in a week. I was convinced it was locked and there was an obstruction. There wasn't. After an hour of exercising and stretching I was able to get it almost straight and am working on a regime of stretches and squeezes to get full range of motion back. Next, I see the orthopedic surgeon. They say ALC surgery is an art. I want the Rembrandt of Joint Surgeries working on mine. I did a little lopsided celebratory dance when I found he was in network. I see him on Tuesday afternoon. His office is downtown on the seventeenth floor. I've never had an appointment on a floor higher than four before. One day I will take the stairs to his office.

The Universe is Slowing My Roll

Last Wednesday night, I twisted my knee funny during a roller derby drill and popped something out of place. It didn't really hurt, it was just bending in ways it didn't before and felt unstable. The next day it was swollen pretty bad and I went to the doctor. They did an X-ray and an MRI, no broken bones and I won't know about the MRI until Monday. I am off skates until further notice.

On the way home from the Boss game last night I got a flat tire. While doing 70MPH on an eight lane highway. The tire shredded and flew off in pieces. There was smoke. I wrestled the car to the side of the road just fine and called roadside assistance who upon arrival said "It's lucky you drive a big car, all that weight kept you from flipping it." Then we found a very flat spare in the trunk and had to tow the whole car home. Let this be a reminder to check your spare!

Today I am staying in the house. Should I go anywhere, I will hobble there and back. There may be beer involved.

Thank You, Fresh Meat

I'm skating in the third bout in three weeks tomorrow. This on the tail end of something derby related every night this week. I was starting to suffer overload and then today I went and helped at try outs and there is nothing like seeing derby through a new skater's eyes. It's like watching a kid ride the Ferris wheel the first time, sheer terrified excitement followed by giants smiles and a willingness to go around again. Thank you for making it new again ladies.

This Saturday

I'll be skating here this Saturday.

http://www.thehotrodhoedown.com/

Things Kid's Believe

I hocked roller derby t-shirts for the league at the Governor's cup this weekend. A league-mate's daughters got bored at their booth across the aisle and came to play with Jack. He had great fun playing with the elder girl's necklace. To her little sister's horror, she took it off and swung it back and forth in front of him. The little sister exclaimed "No! Don't hypnotize him!"

The Bombadee Report

We are moving again. This time from the coast, inland and my address will officially be Houston, TX instead of a the little town next to Houston, TX. We found a house we like and so we're packing up for Christmas and moving the week of the 27th. We'll miss the kids at the apartments, but we've had over 25 days (not in a row) with either no water or no hot water and just after Thanksgiving I hit my limit of broken pipes in the complex and called a realtor. It was when I just changed a particularly messy baby and turned to wash hands to find the water just off, with no warning. At that moment I decided that even camping would be better because at least I would have water.

The new house has 4 bedrooms (so ya'll can come visit) hard wood floors, a two car garage, and is about five houses down from the neighborhood pool and toddler splash pad. It's twenty minutes from Dan's job and the skate rink and forty-ish minutes to downtown Houston. It's an hour and twenty to the beach. We'll have big trees and bike paths and I'm sure all new kids to play with and best of all, we'll be closer to everyone we know in Houston. Somehow, every friend we've made through work, gaming or derby have all been Northsiders. So yay for being able to visit people without the hour drive.

I don't think I have enough furniture to fill the new space. We really paired down for apartment living so 2011 will bring with it furniture shopping and auctions. I need a couch, bar stools, some patio furniture, a grill (is that furniture?), a chair, a china hutch and maybe a few rugs. Oh, and a washer and dryer but that's really less exciting than couch shopping (Craig's list.) Then when we get there I have to get the Kid registered for school, plan a birthday party, find an exterminator, and a lawn guy and get ready for my first away game since 2009.

The Extra Special Super Duper Seventh Birthday Sleepover Extravaganza will take place all at the new house. We're going with traditional cake, ice cream, balloons and party games and then her best pal will sleep over. My first baby is turning seven. There will be more on this later.

I've joined the Houston Roller Derby Knockouts, we're a travel team but not THE travel team (The HaRD Knocks.) At the beginning of January we're going to Baton Rogue to play against Red Stick Roller Derby. I'm pretty excited about it. We decided instead of schlepping the whole family out for one night, just I am going to to with my team mates. On top of moving to the new place, it's the best Christmas present ever. Yes, sometimes a woman, a mom, and full-time housewife who loves her family dearly, enjoys time off. Thank you Husband.

Back on all Eight

Last night was my first night back on skates. It was exhilarating, scary, totally fun and painful. I fell in the first five minutes while executing a turn around toe stop but my body remembered how to fall and fairly quickly started to remember how to stay up. Later, I scrimmaged and crunched my own fingers pretty good by falling on them. Besides the familiar old aches and pains, I feel pretty good today.

Sat. from 2-8pm is the Bayou City Boss Fundraiser

at

Cecil's Tavern

600 West Gray

Houston, TX

There will be Boss merch, food, silent auction items, sno cones, shot block, Boss skaters, AND MORE!

Scavenger Hunt Details:
*1st, 2nd and 3rd prize trophies, winner splits the pot with the Bosse$.
*$15 pre-register up to Sept. 10 at 7 pm. Buy tickets form any Boss skater or at hrdbosslove@yahoo.com.
*$20 day-of at the door.
*Arrive @ 2 to register and gather teams.
*Teams are released @ 3pm sharp.

I have tickets and even if you live far away and can't make it, donations to the team are welcomed. :)

I Heart Bossy Women

I'm not skating this season. After July, I still have to wait six weeks until I can get back on skates and at a best case scenario that gets me up and going right at the end of the 2010 season. As a plus is gives the few off-ish months to get conditioned and literally back up to speed before the 2011 season. This has not stopped my team from including me in absolutely everything we do.

I'm not sure they know how much of a difference it makes to someone who just moved here and doesn't know a soul, to instantly treat them as family. I wasn't sure how I felt about it myself, until last night during a giant team hug my co-captain said a few words and I had turn my attention from having my arms around these wonderfully sweaty women to the crazy shoelaces in the skates gathered around my feet, to keep from getting all choked up and crying. (I know, not very tough - what do ya want I got hormones!) Let me say this, these women have made the move easier and better than I ever could've imagined.