My Ten Year Anniversary Is Coming up

Aug 11, 2015 Bombadee's Garden will be ten years old.  Ten years of posts, links, rants, photos, artwork, bad poetry, videos, books, lists, and comments.  I feel like there should be some sort of celebration.  Maybe cake, dancing and a top ten or something...or a bottom ten (haha!) I'll have to think about what such an events warrants.  Maybe I'll finally update my Blogger Profile Picture...

Sonflowers

I tried all last summer to grow giant sunflowers next to the deck.  I wanted the flower faces to be at eye level during midsummer dinners so we could watch the birds fly in and eat the seeds.  But some asshole from the neighborhood wildlife community kept creeping by in the middle of the night and digging up the seeds for a late night snacks. After loosing another row of seeds this spring I planted some in an egg carton in the house.  Every day I put the seedlings outside for a day of sun and then I bring them back in at dusk to keep them safe. They're a few inches high now and I think I have to put them in the dirt or watch them suffer from not enough root room.  I'm going to try to devise a screen or some sort so they don't get bitten off at the base and munched late in the night.  It makes me anxious.  It's scary to send my sprouts out into the backyard...  Imagine when I have to send my actual children out into the world!

The End of Preschool

He's going to be five.  I went to his preschool graduation today where he won an award for being among the top ten kids who've had the most books read to them over the last month.  Jack likes the same books over and over.

He likes:
I Will Not Ever Never Eat a Tomato
In the Night Kitchen
Ahoy Pirate Pete
We're Going on a Bear Hunt
Go Dog Go
Any Curious George
Any Sponge Bob
Roli Poli Oli
No David

I know most of these by heart, so does he.

It was an emotional graduation as it was a very tough year.  Jack will freely tell you he doesn't like school.  When I drop him off the teacher has to peel him off my hip or my leg and tell him he has to stay and he buries his face in his hands and sobs while I try to get out of the room as fast as possible.  It really puts anything I do while he's at school under a big wet cloud.  When I pick him up, he's happy, playing and smiling and runs up ready to go.  I ask him if school was fun and he says yes.  Sometimes I ask why he doesn't like school and he says he just misses me and being home.  I ask him if he played with any one and he always says "I just played by myself."  I know other kids like him and are happy to see him, as I drop him off and pick him up every day and I see their reactions.  The kids even recognize me now as "Jack's mom" - so he is not ignored or disliked, he just doesn't feel he has any pals at school and he doesn't look forward to it. Repeat this day 180 times.  So to see him today, march up and get a medal and wear his square hat and sit with his class was a joy and a relief.

I was relieved that soon I won't have to watch him bury his face in his hands anymore. I was relieved that they won't have to peel him off my leg anymore.  I was proud we made it - he and me. I have a box of Valentines he makes for me at school.  They each have a heart and say "Mom" & "Jack" on them, sometimes "Ella" is in there too. On particularly hard days, he'd make two for me at school.    This awful school year where we read together and worked on a little homework together and were separated fr a few hours each day and we lived.  We made it. He's taller.  He can write my name and his. He can speak better.  He can do his own seat-belt.  He knows the days of the week. He has life experiences that don't have me in them now.

I hope Kindergarten is better. I keep wondering what the drop off routine will be.  Will I have to walk him all the way to class? Will he like it? Will it be worse? Will he find a friend he likes? I have a good deal of anxiety about it.  I know there's nothing that I can do until next fall when we see how it will go. For now we just count down the last ten days of what I thought was the easiest part of a school career, but for Jack (and me) may have been the hardest.

How to Get Away with Everything

"Mom, you're my girl."

I don't know why...

The Addamses

Adult Wednesday Addams was a you tube hit that I liked.  I read today that the Addams Family Estate has sent Melissa Hunter a cease and desist and You Tube pulled all the videos.  Fans immediately re-posted them, so if you google Adult Wednesday Addams, you can still watch a host of these videos.  Some of the comments I read on Facebook regarding the quarrel:

M.N.  "Some people just don't understand publicity.  They wanna hoard their ideas and allow them to collect dust.  Ignorance and stubbornness are a toxic combination, yo.

H.R. "ridiculous... Others have posted season 1 and 2 but this isn't the first person to have their videos pulled for parody."

N.L. "This makes me very angry"

I'm appalled that people feel entitled to other's ideas like this.  I have great respect for the Addams Family and their Estate.  While I adore the Adult Wednesday Addams series, if the Addams Family feels the character is too true to the original version and isn't enough of a parody to be a departure then they are entitled to decide how the character is presented or not.  Perhaps the Addamses would prefer not to be exploited in fan-fiction like the Star Wars Empire or the Super Hero Complex because... well, I'd say they don't even need to give a reason, it's their right to decide.

While I understand once you send art out into the world it's hard to know how people will feel about it and who it will be shared and re-interpreted by, I stand with the cartoonist's family on this one, out of respect, adoration and some semblance of decorum and legality. Though I'd like to see more of the series - I understand why it's been locked down.  We are not entitled to be the voyeurs of Wednesday Addams or any other person in the family, fiction or non, just because we love it.

How Jack Yells It

Jack laying on the floor yelling "Emergency! Emergency COLD BREAD! COLD BREAD!"

grind

I recently almost had a list with everything crossed off of it.  It lasted about four minutes. Living at a break neck speed trying to stay in front of after school activities and homework and the odd jobs I take to make ends meet is aging me in a way I don't like.  I need a vacation, but then who will prepare for the vacation and really it would just feel like the same invigorating schedule in an unfamiliar place making it tougher to complete tasks.  It'd take a very long time to save up for the sort of vacation where people do things for you and bring you drinks while you lay on your back and look past your toes at blue waves crashing into the powder white sandcastles happy sun-screened children build.  Really I'd like to just save up enough to hire someone to come over here and help me get caught up on the day to day junk that piles up, then maybe I'd like to sleep in for two days in a row.  I need a clone or a robot or some extra money.

If you didn't get it the first time - now's your chance.

They went fast last time.  By the end of the summer we were desperately trying to hang onto five for our own bookshelves.  So here you are internets - The Toughskin Rhinoceros Wrangler Company 2015!  get one - or three :)

ipad white screen of death

from http://en.kioskea.net/forum/affich-123951-my-ipod-has-white-screen-of-death

lilk2300 - Latest answer on Jan 19, 2015 02:10AM
"Hello, my ipod has apples white screen of death but when hold select and menu it turns off and it's still white and then it beeps twice i did this exactly 18 times please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111"

ccln789 Nov 14, 2009 09:50PM "Hey i just learned how to fix the white screen of death all you do is hold the home button then while still holding down the home button hold volume up button then while still holding those buttons go head and hold the power off button and hold that until you see the apple sign and THIS REALLY WORKS SO TRY IT"

***

Just had to do this - totally worked.

That's how tired I am

I am so tired I fell asleep while wearing an itchy wool sweater, during the Sponge Bob movie, with a theater full of valentine's chocolate filled children, cheering at the very apex of dramatic cartoon crustacean action, nearly spilling the small bag of popcorn I was holding in the dark.

Groundhog

It snowed over the weekend.  The park ranger even sent the Girl scouts home from their camping/ski trip early for fear they'd have to stay until they were plowed out today.   Luckily I was the drop off end of the the carpool and didn't have to go out and get them at the beginning of the storm.  I spent a good deal of time yesterday digging out, but just like cleaning house before the kids are asleep, it just kept coming and by the end of the day I was under another foot mess.  It's hard to believe tulips will start poking up through silvery ice water in just six-weeks. But thus says the groundhog.

Surrealist Poetry by Siri

I sometimes tell my phone to write things down while I'm driving.  It doesn't always hear what I say correctly and I always forget to erase the note. If someone looked in my phone they might assume I keep a bunch of surrealist poetry in there. I present to you 5 lists I have very few clues to. I can tell you I think List #6 is likely a love poem.

List #1
Don't frack me bro

Luna film fest

Blue tape
Sort toys
Grocer

List #2
La vie en rose

When I'm small
Dancing rhinos
Minute man
Of very true

List #3

Ferrymen Antelope

List #4
Hungarian Raspsody

1141 Main
Wireless hifi please

Multivitamins full set of Autobons
Salmon yes, tuna & yellow tail no

List #5
Of Maillach and Sherman
Louis the magician 773822917
Popcorn

List #6
Ella
Jack 

Wednesday
Thomas' heart
Tim Stotz
Gulf Shores
Bikes

Jack Says:

Regarding the tag in the back of his shirt: This shirt has skeeto bites in it.

***

When my stomach was growling: Your body is telling you it's hungry.  Get a bread, I don't want to hear your body anymore.

***

Slow on the Draw

"GRESHAM, Ore. (KOIN 6) — A man practicing his open carry right was robbed of the gun he was openly carrying.

William Coleman III was robbed of his Walter- brand P22 just after 2:00 a.m. October 4 in Gresham by a young man who asked him for it — and flashed his own weapon as persuasion.

Coleman, 21, was talking to his cousin in the 17200 block of NE Glisan St., after purchasing the handgun earlier that day, when a young man asked him for a cigarette, police said.

The man then asked about the gun, pulled a gun from his own waistband and said “”I like your gun. Give it to me.”

Coleman handed over the gun and the man fled on foot.

The suspect is thin a black male, between 19 and 23 years old, clean cut with a small patch of facial hair on his chin, and short black wavy hair.

He is roughly six feet tall, wearing grey sweatpants, a white T-Shirt and flip-flop sandals.

The weapon he used in the robbery was described as a possibly semi-automatic, black gun, Gresham Police said."

***

Sledding

We stopped thirty-eight times to get the snow out of a wrist cuff and drink hot cocoa.

Waiting

I was watching snow fall to the left, swiftly change direction and flit right on the endless breath of wind responsible for the biting chill in my hands.  The old mechanic scurried to and fro past the open door, grabbing potions and oils, tools and rags while I rubbed my hands together trying to warm them.  Boat propellers and trap shooting trophies filled dusty shelves next to a pot of coffee I'm sure hadn't been washed since my last oil change. I spent a long time looking at the tall cardboard tube of Domino Sugar imagining it being grabbed several times a day dispensing into thick cups of burned and sour coffee.  It's letters rubbed off and the dark oil of machinery and human fingers layered into a fine shiny amalgamation across the side.  I recognized my car's engine running in the next room and looked up in time to see the mechanic rushing back and forth again, raising my hopes. It was another thirty minutes of watching the snow agitate through the glass and uselessly rubbing my hands together before I would make my escape.

We Are Not Singing This Year

Photo has nothing to do with story, I just liked it.

I always mean to make a great Christmas post but it doesn't happen.  The season is going so fast with such twists and turns that it's all I can do to keep from getting whiplash much less pausing to carefully write my thoughts on the season.  Just when the Holidays wrap up, it's my eldest's birthday which I always go to extra efforts to observe lest it be overshadowed by the above mentioned festivities.

This year we considered a sledding party until the actual snow came.  It was accompanied by negative temperatures and meaner wind-chill factors.  We opted for a good old fashioned house party.  We are in fact inviting boys to this one.  No biggie, they just happen to be friends that are also boys.  We also are not having cake... well, maybe cup cakes but they're going to be cool NOT cute. We aren't singing any happy birthday songs and mostly we'll just be hanging out and maybe playing some music.  Maybe we'll make a play list, and have some dub step, and maybe Uncle Joe will bring over his laser music light show and a black light and a disco ball, just in case anyone feels like dancing or something or whatever.

By February, I'll be officially ready for a couple chocolate hearts chased with a green beer.

The Zen of Beard Trimming

This is the cover art I was honored to do for C.J.'s book. There's only a week left to order a copy.

Order your copy of this book HERE

“The Zen of Beard Trimming: Stories of Punk Rock, Poverty, and the Search For Peace” the personal memoir memoir of speaker, writer, and activist C.J. Campbell. C.J. wakes up every day with the weight of the world on his shoulders; shoulders held up by a pair of crutches. The book is a journey of trying to navigate a world not built for him as walks through life with Cerebral Palsy questioning everything from Capitalism to the very existence of God. When Campbell is not looking for love with Scandinavian models and a good burrito. He looks to smash the social constructs and apathy by any means necessary. If it means putting his own body on the line by walking 75 miles. This irreverent, brash, and at times heartbreaking memoir also includes a foreword by co-founder of Invisible Children and creative force behind the infamous viral documentary “Kony 2012,” Jason Russell."

childhood idols

Gilligan was a pot head
Vinnie Barbarino is in a cult
Mork committed suicide
Fat Albert is a rapist
The ghost of Jack Tripper is all I have left